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*After a couple hours of fighting enemies with seriously cracked-out special attacks…*
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Fei: Okay, Elly, we're going to the factory now. Are you not such a pussy any more? |
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Elly: Sort of, although I still can't take a hit and my Gear is a joke compared to you guys.
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Hammer: Don't worry Elly, I'm the man with the master plan. Come on over and grab some spicy upgrades! |
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Fei: Hammer, how the HELL did you steal a supply Gear from Kislev that easily?
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Hammer: Bro, bro, you shouldn't sweat the small stuff!
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Fei: Good god, Hammer, if you could be any more shady, I'd swear your last name was Mathers.
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Rico: ANYWAY, how do we get through this factory?
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Elly: Like I said, you basically walk in a straight line and try not to, I dunno, trip over yourself.
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Fei: UWAH! *trips and crashes*
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Elly: …this may be harder than I thought.
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Fei: Hey! I'll have you know I tripped not over my own feet but over these pesky Kislev mechanics that keep ambushing us!
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Rico: Pesky, but incredibly stupid, as they seem to keep randomly healing our Gears.
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Citan: Hmm. Push button, receive treasure. Push button, receive treasure. This is almost Pavlovian.
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Fei: Doc, would you quit monkeying around with that button and help us beat this boss?
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Fis-6: Oh come on, like you really need help to beat a weakling like me. *ASPLODE*
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Citan: Well, it seems we have located Kislev's super airship at last.
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Elly: Um, Citan, this thing has WINGS. It's an airplane, not an airship.
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Citan: What the-so it is! How bizarre. Did they never read the cardinal rules of RPGs which explicitly state that all flying vehicles must be aerodynamically impossible?
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Fei: I dunno, didn't Chrono Trigger have that Blackbird jet?
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Elly: But that thing got shot out of the sky after half an hour. I don't think that bodes very well for this plane here.
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Rico: Yeah, but it's got a bunch of top propellers like something out of TaleSpin, so maybe it's just impossible enough to be safe to fly on.
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Citan: Anyway, I propose we fire this thing up and vamoose before the Kislev army gets its shit together and Zergrushes us.
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Fei: But we don't know how to fly it!
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Citan: Do you have a better idea?
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Fei: Not really.
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Citan: All right, everyone. Take a seat. Contact…
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Fei: Contact.
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Citan: Contact?
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Elly: Contact.
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Citan: Contact?
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Hammer: Contact.
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Citan: Contact?
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Rico: START THE DAMN PLANE!!!
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Citan: Right-o! *starts the damn plane*
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Goliath: *rumble rumble* IthinkIcanIthinkIcanIthinkIcanIthinkIcanIthinkIcanIthinkIcanIthinkIcanIthinkIcanIthinkIcanIthinkIcanIthinkIcanIthinkIcan! *soar*
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Rico: Well I'll be damned, it worked.
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Citan: Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking, we have reached our cruising altitude and I have turned off the seatbelt sign… you are now free to move about the-
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Rico: Never mind that, where's the salted peanuts?
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Hammer: So what now, bro? Are we heading back to Aveh?
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Fei: Yeah. Whew… after 25 hours of everything going wrong for me, it looks like things are finally starting to go smoothly.
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Citan: -well, folks, looks like I will have to turn the seatbelt sign back on, as there is a homicidal maniac in a Gear approaching at high velocity. Things may get a little bumpy.
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Fei: Zuh, buh, what?!
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Grahf: Here comes Mighty Mouse! *ZOOM*
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Elly: Fei, where are you going?!
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Fei: To do a little wing walking. Don't worry, I remember this bit from The Rocketeer.
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Hammer: Geez, Rico and Elly went out there with him too. It's times like this I'm glad I don't have a Gear so they can't make me fight.
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Citan: What about that Gear you swiped in the factory-
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Hammer: LA LA LA, I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!!
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Part 25
Home
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